The depths
It was a long journey of healing from burnout and I'm grateful for the journey as horribly hard as it was for months on end. I learned so much about myself, my relationships, and my body. It had been giving me signals all along that I ignored.
It was in this healing that I was introduced to Human Design and I wanted to know it all! I felt like someone had given me a language for my lived experience. I began to learn how "I am" was not a problem. I'm not too sensitive. I don't take too long to make decisions. I am meant to dig deep into a subject. I am meant to find things in my life that I love and I'm not meant to work towards retirement so that I can then enjoy my life.
None of us are meant to work towards retirement, we're meant to enjoy our lives now even when they are incredibly hard. If we can't find joy in our lives then we need help.
I've been in the dark depths where joy felt like it didn't exist. Finding small pieces of joy in my life helped pull me out of these dark depths. That, some medicine journeys, and a lot of therapy.
If you're in a dark place and feel like a dark heavy blanket has consumed you, I advise you to please seek professional therapy help.
This life is a journey, not a destination. There are good days and bad days. I want to acknowledge that we all experience life differently.
The things that brought me joy in my darkest days were feeling the sunlight on my face, moving my body, and laughing with my daughter. I have a mental list when I’m having a rough day of things that I can do to bring a spark of joy into my day. Lately, it’s been drawing. Some days, it’s taking a nap
What are things that bring you a spark of joy? If you don’t know, start a list of the things that bring you joy.
It could be walking the dog, drinking tea from your favorite mug, doodling, reading on the couch, being with friends, a date night with your spouse, watching the sunset or the sunrise, feeling the sun on your face, talking to a friend on the phone instead of texting.
Putting on some music and making yourself dance even if you don’t feel like it.
Taking a quiet moment to write in your journal at the end of a long day.
Closing your eyes and noticing your breath.
Telling your kids a terrible joke and laughing with them. The list is endless, you might have one that really sings to your soul.
Then on a rough day where you feel there is no joy, consult your “Joy” list. If you need to put the “Joy” on your calendar, do it! It doesn't have to take hours, it can be something that's 10 minutes. Those 10 minutes can be the reset you need or relax your spiraling mind.
Be well, dear friends.
